ZIMBABWEAN President Robert Mugabe didn’t trip, nor was he pushed — or maybe he was — when he took a small dive on the red carpet while descending some steps at Harare airport last week.

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In fact, he may not even have fallen at all, according to Zimbabwe’s fawning Information Minister Jonathan Moyo.

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“Nobody has shown any evidence of the president having fallen down because that did not happen,” Moyo was quoted as saying. He blamed a hump in the carpet at a point where two pieces had not been laid out properly. “To be honest with you, even Jesus, let alone you, would also have tripped in that kind of situation,” he said.

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So old Bob tripped but did not fall, or half fell, and a half fall is not the same thing as a full fall, face down.

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Some security officials have reportedly been suspended, including, presumably, the unfortunate carpet layer, who may now face accusations of sabotaging the carpet.

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With the luck of Jesus, he may be ordered to attend an advanced course in presidential security and carpet-laying at Zimbabwe’s intelligence academy. Bless him!